On Being More Generous

Summer affords me extra time for reflection, which can be both therapeutic and totally overwhelming for me. I look up close at the parts of my life that need organization, discipline, and well, to be spruced up. With any close examination of the self comes cringing at what is made visible. In any event, it's been becoming increasingly clear to me that as a single person, the virtue of generosity is one that I need to particularly strengthen. (This is not to say that single people are not generous -- it is truly a pointed commentary on myself at this moment in my life, and I happen to be single).

As Christians we're called to be generous with our time, talent, and treasure. I'd like to think I have the talent portion covered, in that I try to exhaust myself in my vocation as a teacher both inside and outside of the classroom, and well beyond any boundaries set by the school calendar. Of course there is always room to improve in that area, but for now, I'm going to table the "talent" portion of this venture.

Generosity with time. In order to be more generous with my time, I need to be disciplined with the use of my time. This means that first and foremost, I must stick to a prayer schedule. While of course this schedule must be flexible to meet the demands of the present moment, it also should be rigorously adhered to. Giving time to God seems like the first logical step in the process. But if I think seriously about my life on any given day, I could gain back significant time if I monitored how long I spend perusing the internet or flipping through channels on the tube. Even if I tell myself it will only be for a moment, I inevitably lose precious moments that could be better used in the service of my vocation, my family, or my friends. It's quite simple, and demands my full attention and will. Purposeful internet use and leisure time involving the television is something I'd like to incorporate into my daily schedule.

Generosity with treasure. Well, I always joke about working as a teacher and that while we don't get paid in monetary means, I do get paid in other ways. In reality though, if I think about what I'm called to spend my money on (and who it should be spent on), I could easily cringe at careless spending on myself that could be better used (and even better used for things that I actually need rather than want). In an effort to kick this generosity into gear, I've decided to take a pledge, and I ask my sisters to hold me accountable. As of today, July 5, 2011, I will not buy myself clothing or accessories for one full calendar year. (I realize moms who have children are used to such sacrifices and might laugh at this!) Now, there are some notable exceptions that are necessities: I am in desperate need of running sneakers, socks of all sorts, and in the fall I will need to replace some worn out shoes. But, I am not in need of clothing for work or for leisure. I realize that for someone who likes to shop, likes to look fashionable, and works in an environment in which my image is (unfortunately) part of the way into keeping students interested, this is going to be challenging. But in reality, it's absolutely necessary in order for me to be more generous with my money. I'm really excited about the challenge and will be prayerful about what it will do for myself and for others. Thanks in advance for your encouragement, and for pointing out when I've got to sew back on a button or fix a hem!

Hello, Hemlines

Well, thank the Dear Lord. Designers are showcasing longer hemlines that are not only more modest, but definitely more figure-flattering for the normal-sized woman. I've got to be honest. The past few spring and summer seasons have been tough. I have loved the feminine details that are emerging...the flowers, petals, jewels, and ruffles that made their way onto dresses and cardigans...but the hemlines were significantly above the knee, making tights nearly always a necessity. Let's be honest...who wants to wear leggings or tights in the summer? Not me. And if you're like me, the lower part of your leg is an asset, while the upper should remain hidden all year round. And even though designers really embraced defining the waist, which is flattering for every woman, the hemlines still crept higher and higher.


While I've been on spring break, I've been flipping through magazines, watching What Not to Wear, and getting myself to the stores with sales, riding this trend of longer hemlines and loving every minute of it. Even pants are starting to get a higher waist and a more flattering line down the leg. Throw out those board shorts from the past years ladies, because sleek, Audrey Hepburn-like pants that grace the ankle are back in. I would say the big A word to celebrate, but it's Lent, so...Praise the Lord!


My picks for dresses:

I bought this one!

I want this one.

Next paycheck.

My picks for skirts:

Everything you could ever want.

Splurge.

Hello, beautiful.

My picks for tops and accessories:

Figure-flattering.

Random, but fun.
Love scarves!

Thou Shall Not Covet

Oh, but how I do!

Totally, Thoroughly, Unabashedly Girly Post

I just really like this dress :)

Fall Fashion: longer skirts!

Last night I flipped through all the Spring 2011 RTW fashion shows (NYMag has slideshows of everything), and I was glad to note that skirts are getting longer. Not really surprising, they couldn't get much shorter, but it has me hopeful for the coming year, fashion wise. Then this am, flipping through my blog feeds, I see this gorgeous picture from fashion photographer Garance Doré. Love it!

Links

I have a huge pile of links I've wanted to share with our readers, but I keep forgetting to post them. So here are seven* of them, just for you. Read, discuss, ignore, what-have-you:

1) A mother gives a frank assessment of "who's to blame" when it comes to body image problems.

2) Interesting look at what young adult Catholics are looking for when it comes to community.

Few young adults make such a swift and seamless switch to a new, vital faith community--which means many feel pangs of panic and loss. It's hard to replicate the built-in, tight-knit community of on-campus Catholics, says Elizabeth Moriarty, 32, who has worked as a pastoral associate and now serves as assistant director of the Gender Relations Center at the University of Notre Dame. "That structure is in place, and when it's not there and they have to do a little more work to get it, people don't know what to do."

That aimlessness is sharpened by a sense of isolation, says Paul Jarzembowski, director of young adult ministry for the diocese of Joliet, Illinois. "Can I find my peers? I don't see them in the office. I don't see them on the train, and they're out there somewhere."

Via OSV.

3) Joe Carter at First Things shares a Big Think article on sexual promiscuity and happiness here.

4) Noelle Daly writes for The American Interest on the Pill and fertility:

But even as the Pill alleviated fear of the unwanted pregnancy that would confine a woman to the home, it also dramatically heightened anxiety about the ticking biological clock. Thus the Pill sparked one revolution that led in turn to another: Infertility born of long-postponed pregnancy found a solution in assisted reproduction technology. The first revolution sped the disconnection of sex and marriage, the second the disconnection of marriage and childrearing. The Pill gave us first the joy of sex without babies, and then, in effect, the freedom and convenience of creating babies without sex.

Read it all here.

5) The Knights of Columbus have a semi-regular series profiling Catholic fathers, called Fathers for Good. I love this. Let us commend the great men we know who live well and serve as a witness to the Christian life for themselves, their colleagues, and most importantly, their families.

6) Pope Benedict XVI discussed the "special contribution" women make to the work of Theology on the feast of the Birth of Mary. via EWTN.

7) Skirts v. Pants. Referee: Simcha Fisher.

* I read once that to-do lists should never have more than seven items. I don't know why exactly, except that seven is an easily graspable number, and gives one a sense of doing something without being insurmountable. So, seven it is.

New Dress A Day Blog

Just imagine how much fun it would be to be able to wear (and afford to do so) a new dress every single day for whole year. And the kicker?? You'd only have to pay a dollar a day to so! Sound too good to be true? Not for this savvy young lady from California. I might be a little slow on the discovery of this, but you MUST check out what this young lady does with a sewing machine and a 1 dollar thrift store find on the New Dress A Day blog. This girl can turn any hopeless time piece into a wearable and more often than not, very cute look! She's got me inspired!

The Archives of Atrocious Celebrity Fashion

Why is Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes at the top of this post? Did you ever think you'd see the day we'd begin posting about those two? Well, here's why.

It's easy to get sucked into celebrity gossip. VERY easy. Luckily, I have willfully blinded myself to the popular celebrity gossip websites. I get my fill of celebrity gossip from the celebrity fashion blog Go Fug Yourself. The subtitle says it all: "Fugly is the new pretty."

Jess and Heather share daily the most horrendous and hilarious celebrity outfits. They are witty, well read, and have a near encyclopedic knowledge of pop-culture, which makes their commentary hilarious, and totally un-vacuous. It's quite a feat for a celebrity blog. Plus, you learn all sorts of awesome things about fashion. Case in point, yesterday's post on Maggie Gyllenhal (below) elicited these wise words:

In many respects, I feel like I could Photoshop a septuagenarian's head onto this and you'd be like, "Yeah, all right, looks feasible." Except that no septuagenarian worth her blue rinse would pair a slacks suit that painfully sensible with a shawl made out of an airplane napkin. Score another point for the older generation.

I laugh out loud daily at their commentary, bad puns, pop-culture references and nostalgia, and amazing ability to find the worst outfits. Get your celeb fix from this lovely duo. You won't be disappointed.

Thats "The One"

My best friend from college is getting married this fall. She is an incredibly low maintenance bride, and everyone is pitching in to help with this small, family centered wedding. Her future MIL is planning the reception, and I am designing the invitations, and her sister-in-law is giving flowers as a wedding gift, and all the bride has to do is nod "yes" or "no" to the hundreds of little decisions to be made in preparation for the wedding. (She's even letting us bridesmaids wear our own dresses!)

The one thing she cared about and had definite opinions on was finding a dress. She had been out scouting a bit, and had found a few dresses she liked, so she and I and another bridesmaid went shopping this last weekend to buy the dress.

This concept of "the dress" is hard. It is perhaps the most important piece of clothing you'll wear (certainly the most attention grabbing, even if it is simple). For a Christian who lives her life chastely and cares about the Sacrament, it is more than just an empty symbol too--it is white and pure and that means something.

But, on the other hand, it is just a dress.

At the shop, we looked at many gowns, all of which looked amazing on her, and none of which were right. They were mostly strapless, which she didn't want, and she was between sizes, which meant alterations, which brought the dresses out of her price range. Then, after looking at all these gowns, we pulled one off the rack. With a v-neck and empire waist and delicate embroidery, it was simple but graceful. And when she put the dress on, she looked so relieved, because it fit, it was modest, it was lovely, and it was on sale.

As I look at bridal magazines, I find that even in articles that talk about doing weddings on a budget, people are still will to drop several thousand dollars on a wedding dress--because the dress has such an aura around it. It's the one. But for people on a budget, the look of the dress is not everything. THE ONE happens to be one that fits, that is comfortable, and elegant and serves it's purpose (to make the bride look amazing), and is affordable and not stress inducing.

Her dress is not the most beautiful dress I've ever seen. It's not even the most beautiful dress she tried on. But is was "the one". Funny how that works.

Summer Fashion: Weddings from Julian

Well, Agatha takes the cake on invitations to weddings! I am going to three this summer, but it's the first time in awhile that I'm not in any of the weddings. And I think that means that I can actually try to wear one of my bridesmaid dresses to a wedding. Drumroll, please...

Sophia silk dress from J.Crew

I wore this dress to my friend M's wedding in 2008, and it's a classic cut and beautiful material. I think I'll jazz it up with some fun strands of beads or a hair clip.

To the other weddings (where guests saw me donning the first dress dress), I think I'd choose something like this and wear my hair low in a loose bun off to the side.

Dress by J. Crew

Summer Fashion: Weddings with Agatha

Ah! Weddings! I will likely post about this later, but I think I have found my calling in life. I should be a professional wedding guest. I would be very good at it, because I've had a LOT of practice... including a whopping 9 more weddings to attend this calendar year...and a few on the horizon for 2011!

Needless to say, this means getting a lot of dresses. And, preferably, dresses that I can wear in multiple seasons. We also have to be wary of bridesmaid colors--which means prints are always a win. Here are some of the dresses I've been eyeing for this (continual) wedding season.

Stripes are a fun choice for a casual summer wedding. Anthropologie.



This has everything great about recent trends: aqua, metallic, with architectural details. I'd pair it with a bright linen or silk shawl in chartreuse or salmon, and vibrant heels. Mod Cloth.



The bow on this navy dress is so sweet. The color is seasonless. Shabby Apple.

Summer Fashions: Business from Julian

(N.B.: Sorry for the late post. We had some technical difficulties. --TMS)

Well, since I'll be working part-time at a parish doing administrative work this summer, I figure that I should get a few pieces to work with what I have. I think I'm going to dress up some basics with a fun summer blazer. It's easy to pair with a crisp white button-down shirt and black pants or a skirt. The brighter the better, I say!

I'm also thinking that some fun necklaces could really liven t-shirts up if paired with dressy bottoms and shoes.

Summer Fashion: Business from Agatha

Well, I have to tell you, summer business is perhaps my favorite--though it is unbelievably difficult to pull off well. (I rarely succeed!) A few big common missteps include: wearing sundresses; wearing flip-flops; not bringing a jacket or sweater to work (offices are cold!); wearing espadrilles or other super casual heels; having bare shoulders; having a messy pedicure.

My formulas are simple: a) crisp lightweight blouse with a straight skirt and simple pumps, b) a linen suit, or tropical weight wool pants and a light jacket or c) a sleeved dress. I work in a very conservative office, so most sandals would not be appropriate (I wear peep toes, mostly). If this sounds boring...I'm sorry to say, it sort of is. But the key is to look cool and put together, not uber-fashionable. Here are examples of these three key styles, plus a few accessories for the fun of it.

Exhibit A: Skirt and Blouse.

The trick is to make this either super colorful, or monochromatic. Tuck in your blouse, carry a fun bag and wear a great pair of shoes and you're set for anything. I'd pair this lovely pale pink blouse and spotted skirt (which looks short, but isn't in person, at least not on me!) with cool accessories: raspberry slingbacks, and round jeweled earrings and a straw-colored tote.

Exhibit B: Jacket and Pants

This is a tricky one. You need to be sure to pick a blouse nice enough on its own, but that works well under a jacket. You can't go with a camisole here, because you're going to be too warm. I'm not the biggest fan of J.Crew, but they really do excel at affordable well made suits, so I suggest one of their wool gabardines, in a pale color like this gray. Pair with it a fun jacket and pretty blouse. Because these are pants, you can get away with more casual shoes (like wedges, or flat sandals). For accessories, I'd add a flower pin and call it a day.

Exhibit C: Sleeved Dresses

Ah! this one is such a trail. I am loving all the little shifts that are so popular right now, and they pair wonderfully with a sweater or jacket. But sometimes it's just too hot for that. And the only thing to do is wear a dress. Luckily shirt-dresses are seeing a bit of a renaissance as well. The one below is from Shabby Apple. Here are a few more favorites: Ann Taylor; Anthropologie; Macy's

Summer Fashion: Causal from Julian

I won't be able to take any vacations this year, but I will have a few weekend BBQ's and a trip to New York City to visit a friend. Even though the summer affords a teacher like me with the chance to dress really casually, I love wearing dresses and skirts when I can. There is something about linen or cotton skirts that make me feel so feminine. If I could, I think I'll go with neutrals and don something like this:

Skirt from Banana Republic

Shirt from Anthropologie

Bag from Old Navy

Summer Fashion: Casual

This week, while Edith is still travelling, Julian and I are going to do a series on summer fashion. We'll share with you all our ideal summer outfit for 1) Casual/Vacation 2) Business and 3) Formal (weddings, graduations, etc.)

Kicking off with the casual, since I'll be spending my vacation in my favorite California city, I wanted to find something put together but still casual. The blouse is lightweight, the linen pants will be cool, and those espadrilles are incredibly comfortable--I live in them in the summer! And I just adore the big bag, with that bold (albeit odd) print.

California Dreaming:

Light Speed Blouse from Anthropologie

Alfani Linen and Rayon Pants from Macy's

Pink Studio Open Toe Espadrille from Endless.com

Pleasted Shoulder Bag from happyKatt on Etsy

UPDATE:
I can't believe I forgot to include a jacket (a necessity for cool CA nights) and jewelery! This jacket is sporty and versatile. And green: the most underrated neutral! And these awesome earrings echo the pattern of the top.


Ann Taylor Loft Jacket


Dichotomous Earrings from Etsy seller Nervous System

Fashion: The Met Museum Gala

Called the Academy Awards for fashion, the Met Museum's annual Fashion Gala took place last saturday. The theme was a dull and broad "American Woman" blah-blah-blah, and as a result the dresses were of a wide variety of basically awful gowns. (Go to my favorite trashy celebrity fashion review site, GoFugYourself for more looks.

This is a fun event fashion-wise, because you can take many more risks. Its not on TV, its not the Oscars, and, really, only recently has it seens exposure in the media besides a short spread in Vogue and Harper's Bazaar. My personal favorite outfit from the met ball was Elle Macpherson's chartruese gown matched with gold flip-flops (but, alas, I cannot find a photo...). For this week's ball, there seemed to be only a few interesting and lovely gowns--gowns that stood athwart the sad trends like trains on short dresses, middle slits, inconsistent ruching and ruffles, and weird weird weird lace. Whoooie! After all that you might ask youself: was there anything good? Yes: here were my top fives:


#5: Nicole Ritchie's luxe bohemian look gets me nearly every time. I hate to say it, but she's got style.


#4 Zoe Saladena (is that how you spell it?) rocks this one sleeve Clavin Klein sheath. Love it.


#3 Carolina Herrerra is, of course, the quintessential female designer. And her she looks completely elegant and timeless in a gown of her own design. AND she wears gloves without looking like a poser. Brilliant.


#2 Iman looks stunning in this modern throwback to the 1930s. Absolutely stunning. I have not seen a black dress I liked this much in a really really long time.


#1 Also echoing the 1930's, I just love Kate Bosworth's lovely printed bias gown. The colors and textures transform a flattering silouhette into something luminous and enchanting. I haven't seen anything I liked better this whole year.

Oscar's Fashion Re-cap

The older women didn't win the statuettes this year. But they won as far as fashion was concerned. To my mind Helen Mirren, Sigourney Weaver, and Meryl Streep were so supremely elegant, and the best dressed of the evening:
Sigourney Weaver rocks the red one shoulder (my very favorite style dress ever).

Meryl Streep looked so lovely, and so comfortable in this wrap dress, with those gorgeous shoulders. I'm not a huge fan of the slit (what's up with all the center slits, people...that' NEVER looks good!), but otherwise, I think it's perfect. Also, mad props for wearing a white dress, and not looking like a bride or a debutante (read: Amanda Seyfried.)

Well, Helen Mirren is a goddess, so, it's no surprise that she looks so radiant here. So incredibly radiant. And dear Christopher Plummer--you looks as handsome and as wise as ever.

As for other favorites of mine:
Sandra Bullock looked gorgeous in this luminous dress, made of vintage lace. I can't tell if the top is sheer, or if there's something underneath, so I am not sure how it counts for modesty points.

Tina Fey totally redeemed her Golden Globe disaster with this lovely one shoulder dress.

Queen Latifah was gorgeous. (And lilac was a big color this year!)

For prints, I gotta tell you, I loved Maggie Gyllenhal's dress. She is always so bold, and always wears prints, which I just love. Beautiful color, broard brush strokes, vibrant pops of colors: beautiful! (Julian does not agree.)

Also...MOLLY RINGWALD STILL LOOKS SO YOUNG! And yes, I loved Cameron Diaz's dress too. And Lenny Kravitz' daughter was lovely. So much better than another Bright Young Thing.


I don't know who Paula Patton is, but I adore her bright orange dress! (and what a cute little baby bump.)

And let's give a quick shout-out to Katherine Bigelow who looked elegant and modern and poised as she won Best Director and Best Picture, breaking that glass ceiling.

My pick for the worst dress is Deborah Ann Woll, which is just so much awfullness I don't really know where to begin. Shape, color, slit, neckline, everything....

I am sure it will end up on a lot of worst dressed lists, and I can't really frogive it for being purple, but I kinda like Zoe Saldana's crazy dress. I should say, I like the boldness of it. It took guts to wear, and she wore it with confidence. Sometimes guts really don't pay off, like Sarah Jessica Parker's yellow Chanel gown (it looked like it was attacking her!)

The other horrific dress was Charlieze Theron, who looked like she was being groped by giant rosebuds. It was so close to being lovely, had they just put a few more rosettes on the bust, or changed the placement a bit. Alas...

Finally, I just have to give a little shout out to my beloved, Ed Asner, who looks every bit the gentleman. What a guy.

Shop 'N Save

Just a quick post to help my sisters and our readers out with fashion finds. Ever wish you knew before you got to a store that they were having things on sale so that you budgeted in more money? Ever get a little annoyed when you buy something and see it on sale a week later? In Style magazine online has an e-mail alert system to let you know what styles and brands will be going on sale and when. You can specify not only sizes, brands, and how often you'd like to be altered, but also which items in particular you'd like to know about. Hopefully this will make shopping sales a bit easier! Happy hunting!

A Fashion Find

I don't pretend to know about the trends on the runways or who did what at Fashion Week in NYC. But occasionally I'll read the Style section in the New York Times, and this week I came across a refreshing article about a model who might just be on mission for a more realistic look on the runways -- and by realistic, I mean less 6 foot-half nude-childish-waifs.

“I don’t do nudes, I don’t do semi-nudes, I don’t do cigarette shots,” Coco Rocha was saying on Sunday evening before the Diane Von Furstenberg show at the Bryant Park tents. “It took me a long time in the business to realize I didn’t have to do everything people told me I should if I wanted a career.”

And later...

Now, Mr. Scully said, the sheer number of aspirants is so great that a span of five years (or 10 seasons) is almost enough to qualify a model for a gold watch.

“What happens when these girls develop and turn into women?” Mr. Scully asked. “What’s going to happen to Karlie Kloss,” he added, referring to the teenager discovered at a charity benefit fashion show in her native St. Louis and now one of the most desirable models in the business, “when she develops breasts?”

Ms. Rocha can answer that question. “I’m not in demand for the shows anymore,” said the model, who has worked for Marc Jacobs, Prada, Chanel, Dior, Jean Paul Gaultier and Louis Vuitton, among many others.

Hopefully more designers (and thereby others in the media) will take note of Rocha's points and recognize that women are not children and that a woman's body ages and changes in shape -- and that is not only okay, but part of what it means to be feminine.

Red-Carpet Ready

I had an idea for a Profound and Important Post...but it is gone. So, pop-culture will have to suffice. More specifically: fashion. Most specifically: awards show fashion.

It's award season again, and that means we get to feast our eyes on any number of gorgeous dress that we will never be able to wear (let alone have a reason to do so), and hideous dresses that people couldn't pay us to wear. I'll leave you to peruse the hideous ones over at the brilliant and funny Go Fug Yourself blog. Here are some of the pretty/elegant/ladylike dresses worn at recent awards:


Diane Kruger's SAG dress is almost a lovely as her Golden Globe dress.


Who doesn't want to be Tina Fey? What a woman.


She ended up on a lot of worst-dressed lists, but I thought January Jones was adorable at the Golden Globes.


This is Lea Michele, who, I understand, is in Glee. I have never seen her, or Glee. I have also never seen anyone wear a nude-colored dress so well. It takes guts to pull something like this off, and I think she's got guts.


I'm not going to lie. Cameron Diaz is becoming a fashion favorite. Adorable.


Amy Adams, I didn't think you could glow anymore...and then you got pregnant. Gorgeous.


Ok, so Carey Mulligan's dress wasn't amazing...though I love this obsession with salmon pink...but this broach on her was waist was adorable!

(Are there any favorites that I missed?)