Talitha Koum

When I first wrote the description of this blog on the masthead, I described Julian, Edith and I as "girls." Julian pointed out that it ought to read "women" since most of our questions dance around the question "What does it mean to be a modern, Catholic woman?"

In the 2007 film Juno, Juno MacGuff nervously pacing in front of her parents, finally comes out and tells them "I'm pregnant." Her father, shocked, says "I thought you were the kind of girl who knew when to say when."* She replies, "I don't really know what kind of girl I am." The movie, in a large part, is her finding that out.

Her words really resonated with me. Juno has the experience of "woman"--sex, pregnancy, childbirth--but then goes back to being a normal teenager, playing the guitar with her slightly dorky boyfriend on the front porch. I haven't had any of those experiences. And I still think of myself as a "girl." Perhaps this really is the question facing me as a young woman: what's the difference (besides experience) between the little girl I feel like, and the woman I ought to be.

This is an incredibly difficult question with regards to sexuality. As modern American mores increasingly define female maturity by her sexual license, being a virgin is thought childish. As our culture projects a more and more sexualized ideal woman (through fashion, film, music, etc.), it is more and more difficult to feel womanly and feminine without feeling immodest.

These sexuality issues are important, but they don't address the whole situation. St. Paul says "When I was a child, I used to talk as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I became a man, I put aside childish things." (1 Cor 13:11) Though our culture thinks virginity is childish, it's not; the real question is one of innocence. Though I am a virgin, I am not innocent.

Theoretically, I think innocence can be regained; once lost, it is not lost forever. Practically, I'm not sure how it is done, but paradoxically, I think innocence is fostered and cultivated through the acknowledgment of the father and child relationship between God and his creatures. I am God's child, and I don't see how I could go wrong, sheltered in the arms of my Heavenly Father.

The Gospel reading a few months ago told of the daughter of Jarius, who is dying. Christ comes to her and says, "Talitha Koum," which means "Little Girl, Arise!" I want to take these words to heart in my own search for innocence. I may not know what kind of girl (or woman) I am, but I know that Christ is calling me forward on a path of grace and virtue. I need only heed his call. Arise!