Three 20-something women trying to figure out what it means to be lay, Catholic, and modern all at once.

December 29, 2008

Sexual Complimentarity

 Michael Novak in First Things writes about the complimentarity of Man and Woman.  He traces the pagan obsession with sexual license (in which women were "merely instruments"), and contrasts that with the complimentarity of man and woman in Jewish/Biblical notions of spousal love.  Here's the money quote, towards the end:
It is worth noting that the fundamental energy of the family, in this vision, is spousal love.  This love is not a sentimental feeling or a passionate desire, but a firm commitment to the good of the other.  Not "her good" as you wish it were, nor even the good as she wishes it were, but her objective good as identified by reason.  Thus. the point of even sex id realistic love.  Not mutual self-indulgense, but the growth in adulthood and virtuous living that raising a family entails.  (There is no point in getting married if you don't want to hear the truth about yourself--especially all those truths you don't really want to hear--from your spouse or your children.)  Those who live closely together come to shed their illusions about each other, and to love in each other the better self that each would like to become.  This is realistic love.

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