However, for all of its absurdity, the title got me thinking...when it comes to dating these days, aren't we all in the dark?
Someone recently asked me about my move to a new city and how my success with dating in the past year had been. "How many dates have you been on, Julian?" "Well," I answered, "that depends." Do I count the men I've gone to events with alone but who have not paid for the meal or the ticket? Do I count it if I asked the guy to go somewhere? What if he paid for the whole evening or afternoon but himself qualified it as "hanging out"? What qualifies as a date anymore, anyway?!?!?! Does anyone else feel completely lost? Do we always have to know if we are on a date or is there room for a little grey?
Maybe I'm just a little frustrated that I just split a $10 bill after a guy just asked me to coffee. This probably proves a guy's point that if you pay, she will assume it's a date...
Posts
4 comments:
Oh my gosh, you had to pay for your coffee. LAME
I mean...for real? What a total STUPE. Man, when the right one comes, "J", I promise you he'll pay for your cup o' joe.
I'm afraid that dates are sometimes like recessions: you can't know for sure that you're in one until after the fact.
Most people, both men and women, like incrementality: she mentions coffee, he says yes that would be nice (and picks up the $10 tab), she says afterward what a nice time she had and mentions the art museum, he suggests dinner afterward, etc, etc. Nobody wants to stick their neck out too far, and rightly so; you need not risk all of your heart on a stranger.
One of the signs of a blossoming relationship is that you pick up on each other's ques and are comfortable with the size and frequency of the increments. Of course we're all in the dark; we always have been. It's the light which proves it just might be something special...
Vino, I love you! Same to you!
Aaron, thanks for your beautiful response!
Post a Comment